october-moon's Diaryland Diary

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Just get Christmas over with!

Wow, Azam called me! I couldn't believe it. I acted like a complete idiot. I kept laughing and I know I made myself look stupid. I was so nervous. God, I know I looked like an idiot. He'll probably never want to talk to me again.
That made up for all the other things that I happened to. It's gloomy and we had kids running around the house and I'm not in a good mood.
Alan's grandmother bit my head off because she was listening in on a convo and I said some words that she didn't like. I don't really care, but for Alan's sake, I won't talk like that anymore while he's at his grandma's house.
I haven't gotten a decent night's sleep since all this kids got here on Tuesday. I just want to sleep without hearing kids running around screaming. I definitely know I am not ready to be a mother yet. I won't be for a loooong time.
I CANNOT WAIT FOR CHRISTMAS TO BE OVER! I can't stress that enough. I want the holidays to be over NOW. I want life to go back to normal.
There is a big snow storm going on in the western part of the state yet we have no snow at all. It's just a gloomy, cold mess outside. I want to sleep and then sleep some more...

4:33 p.m. - Thursday, Dec. 23, 2004

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