october-moon's Diaryland Diary

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2 year anniversary and a whole lotta randomness!

OMG, I just type a long entry and the window closed! I fucking hate it when that happens. Now I have to type everything over again.:(
What I was saying is, today is my 2 year anniversary at Diaryland! Woo hoo! I don't know what I would have done without my lovely journal. It's been wonderful to have some place where I could share my thoughts and opinions with the rest of the world!
On a darker note, my period is kicking my ass. I have been the most nonproductive today that I've been in a long time. At least with my PMS, I was active and getting things done. All I want to do is sleep right now. But, when I lay down, I can't sleep. I just lay there in sort of a daze.
That prick Scott Peterson got the death sentence. But, I heard that it could take arrox. 20 years for him to be executed. God, why don't they kill him and chop his head, arms, and legs off and stick him out in cold, dark water. Let him suffer the way our Laci and Connor suffered! I hope he has plenty of time to be tortured by the thoughts of his cruel, selfish, evil, indescribable acts.
They've have a "person of interest" in the Jessica case. It's some guy who is a sex offender and lived across the street from the family. Shockingly enough, the grandmother's lie detector results are what lead them to the guy. I don't care who did it. I just want her to be home safe, where she belongs.
I got my printer today:D I can print, now, without worrying about the damn ink level.
I recieved an intensely interesting letter from Azam today. He said "I love you not as my friend, but I love you as my [future] wife and baby's mother." I was absolutely shocked and amazed when I read that! No one has ever said that to me before and, for some odd reason, it makes me feel special. It allows me to feel like I am actually likable, even lovable!
Azam is great! He makes me laugh and he's so sweet. He makes me feel beautiful, as does Rob. As for what Rob feels for me, I still don't understand, but oh well. I guess time will tell.
There was a time when I really didn't like Rob. I was mad at him for what he did to my best friend, but I forgive him. We all make mistakes; he's no different. I just wish Laura could forgive him, as well.
Things have changed. My feelings have definitely changed, concerning Rob. I definitely feel something strong. I don't even know the word for it.
Laura's boyfriend, Gavin, doesn't seem to like me. Laura thinks it's because we (her and I) called him a loser, but, to be quite honest, that's just what he is. The guy is 26 and still a virgin and Laura is his first girlfriend. He's already giving her his family jewelry. I don't know what anyone else thinks of him, but I think he's a serious ding and I guess that's all that matters. lol But, Laura is my best friend and I'm not going to make things hard on her, plus, he's a fellow human, so I'm not going to be mean or disrespectful towards him
I talked to Walter the other day and he acted as if we were complete strangers with nothing at all to say to each other. That's fine. If he wants to block out the year and a half we were together, I don't mind. To be honest, the whole thing is a blur for me, as well. I was miserable for 95% of our relationship. The whole relationship started because I opened my mouth and said things I didn't truly mean. I never was attracted to Walter as more than a friend. I was lonely and depressed and needed someone or something to latch on to. He was always just a brother figure. But, I got in over my head. Honestly, I'm glad we didn't get married. It would have been even more miserable! I wish him the best, though. I hope he will be happy some day, if he isn't already.
I'm loving the iPod and PC! I carry the iPod around with me everywhere I go:D lol It's my baby! I've already got around 181 songs downloaded onto this nifty little device.

11:57 p.m. - Thursday, Mar. 17, 2005

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