october-moon's Diaryland Diary

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I know what I want

I know what I want to do in life. YES, I've found it and no, I'm not joking. I'm going to have a tea shop and possibly import tea, until I have enough money to move to England, then I shall start a tea shop there. I want a job having something to do with tea. I want to dedicate my career life to tea, as well as most of my personal life.
This is it. This is what I want. This feels so right. I feel as if I'm going to cry but I haven't started yet. lol I feel so amazing. I have something to live on for, something to look forward to.
I know now that there was a reason why I haven't given birth to a child, as many times as I prayed and asked God for it, and there is a reason why I haven't gotten married. The higher powers know that I have a mission. There is to be more to my life than being a baby-maker and a wife.
"I found a lead. A single furtive reason" - Billy Corgan

6:58 a.m.

It's such a lovely morning. I guess it's not lovely in the conventional sense. There isn't a magnificent, tri-colored sunrise or bird churping. But it's lovely all the same. The sky is a gray color, like you would only find in a horror film. The winds are going strong and the rain is dropping down. The feeling is cozy. I sit on the front porch, watching water drip into an old bucket on the porch and I look at the droplets of water on a tree branch. This reminds me of England. It's perfect. It's exactly what I want right now.

4:45 a.m. - Wednesday, Aug. 31, 2005

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

previous - next